It's Sunday, and I'm just relaxing at the house, it's nice and quite, and I LOVE IT!!! I write that, not to impress or conive, but more for me, when and if I look back on this post. I honestly am at peace at the moment, and have nothing left to prove, just for today.
Let's see some things since I got back from Portland. Well I just back from Orlando, FL, and it just hit to me to add a link here to the photo's I have online. Orlando, and the conference were intense, there is so much I could write, but alas I am not. I'm tired of talking about it. In a word, AWESOME! A side note, I got to turn in my biggest expense report to date in, and currently still waiting on a check. However, that's a nice segway into, I'm loving my finances right now, can pay ALL my bills, and have enough left over to really attack my debt. Which I am planning on sending in my final payments for 2 cards, this week. WOOHOO!!!!! I am living the best life I've ever known up to this point. I'm the lead sonographer were I work, and I know I have the job for at least a year, and longer if I choose. I'm just in a very stable situation, and have been thinking a lot here lately about some people who have to chosen to leave my life. Why? I want to understand what is different about versus them. Why can I? Why can they not.
I read a wonderful quote by Maya Angelou while I was at the conference. "People can only do what they know to do, not what you think they should know, not even what they think they say they know, they can only do what they know to do." Brilliant! That sums it up nicely, and I've been thinking of this one too, "The higher we soar the smaller we appear to those who cannot fly." F Nietzsche. The lesson I'm learning is that, this life I have is for me, and it's my own custom lesson, and so is yours. And the lesson I'm learning is to let go, it's painful to see others so stunted. So unable to see, and I have to remind myself, what is it I'm missing, what do I not see?
Plato's Allegory of the Cave keeps coming up.
Other things, that are tangible and quantifiable. I'm on day 3 of no smoking, and except for a few instances, I've been vegetarian now for over a month. I'm so very much enjoying life, and I don't want to be apart of others suffering. If I can't stop it, I can at least stop my part of it. I got rid of cable, I found I was never watching it. I've been just to busy, going out, enjoying life, just there's so so much to do, and sitting here watching tv wasn't apart of it for me.
I have no more roomates, and had my cousin do what he does best and bail out while I was at work. I'm not mad, and I understand why he did it. My hasn't tried to contact me for almost 2 weeks, THANK YOU! I hope she finds a rich man, as in right now, and leaves me alone permantely. I'm thankful for life again! I didn't realize how toxic my relationship was, and how much I just cannot stand her not supporting herself, and her children. I didn't know people could be that helpless.
Got the house winterized, and my last elec bill was .47$, nice. Circumstances, have just gotten night and day better, but I don't feel different. Other than I'm grateful to not have to fight and bicker all the time. Just everything is looking up, and I'm slowly starting to see the differences, of my old life to now. I have some more changes in mind, and getting a new car is one of them. That's one of the big ones, and scuba diving again. Til then I have more work in front of me, what I've accomplished so far puts me in a new league, but at the beggining. It's wonderful looking forward to going to work. It's a lot nicer than I've ever known before, and I wouldn't trade a single second for any part of my old life. Might sound hoakey, nonetheless it's true.
Well, I'm running a little low. The detox is taking effect, sore throat, letheragy, but I know it will soon pass. That to is a wonderful thing to know, it will pass. It's nice to have a nice moment your in too, but you get the point.
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